My friend Cass is anxious. She’s living in between. In between houses. In between boxes. In between workout plans. In between schedules. In between single and restless and married and settled.
Cass is great – fun, spunky, caring, adventurous, creative, driven, dependable and motivated. But in between is not her style. Cass
likes craves structure. She’s a list-maker who revels in checking off the boxes. She plans about planning and squeals (I mean it – she really squeals) when her latest and greatest personal organizer arrives in the mail. To feel at peace, Cass needs order and control over what comes next.
After reading in her blog yesterday that she was struggling, I had two choices:
1.) Pat her on the back and offer her reassurance that everything will work out in good time. Enable her misery by telling her it just takes patience, faith…yadda, yadda, yadda.
2.) Kick her ass, and tell her to get up off the couch and stop feeling sorry for herself.
Well…anyone that knows me knows that “yadda, yadda, yadda” is not my style. And Cass knows me. She edited and published my very personal memoir for crying out loud. She would have seen right through the fluff had I gone with option number 1.
So, I got brave. I decided to give her the medicine I would have appreciated most if I was stuck in between. She’s got a great sense of humor, so I trusted she would know just what do with my advice.
This was her blog:
This was my response:
I have learned that whenever I feel the most out of control, that’s the PERFECT time to start a manageable workout plan. Because you CAN control 25-30 minutes a day. That half hour devoted to YOURSELF changes your whole outlook on the rest of the chaos that surrounds you. Getting fit is empowering. Liberating. Mind saving.
You feel good about you at the most basic level – and no one can take that away from you. And when your jeans start to compliment you, rather than suffocate you, the automatic desire to fuel your body instead of food it becomes a welcome addition to more that you CAN control.
Then you start feeling like a great mom for teaching Lex that working out and eating well isn’t a bother, but rather a blessing. You take pride in knowing that some day Lex will view exercise as a given part of her maintenance routine, just like brushing her teeth.
Then – a month or two down the road – THEN you’ll have a whole different outlook on that circle scarf. Before you know it, you’ll start feeling frisky. Cuz dammit, you ROCKED those skinny jeans. And you’ll love prancing in front of the mirror in your bra and underwear. All of a sudden, a whole plethora of fun and exciting options will pop into your mind about different ways to make use of that circle scarf. None of which involve you having to leave the safety of your own home, much less your bedroom.
Get up. Do the work. Take the power back. You’ll be so glad you did.
And let’s face it…So will George.
This morning I checked my email. There was one from a Mrs. Cass McRory.
I stopped at my house last night and picked up my DVD’s. Thanks for inspiring me. Now go write this in a blog post – it’s brilliant.
So here I am. Writing this story in a blog post. Because Cass knew I’d know just what to do with her reciprocal kick in the ass.
I’ve been quiet for way too long. And this post has been empowering. Liberating. Mind saving.
Because of Cass – I got up. I did the work. I took the power back. And I’m so glad I did.
Thank you for the push, my friend. It’s how we do.